Tying a tie. Eating salad. Shaking hands. Easy, right? Well, for some students at premier research university MIT, "correctly" completing these tasks can be a challenge. And since proper business dining etiquette and social graces go hand-in-hand with educational and professional success, Massachusetts Institute of Technology offers its students an elective Charm School program. Yes, you read that right, "Charm School," complete with bachelor's, master's and doctorate degrees.
MIT's Charm School was founded 19 years ago by Dean Travis Merritt. Former MIT President Dr. Charles M. Vest tells the GradPost: "Travis [Dean Merritt] explained that he continually noticed MIT students walking down the Infinite Corridor [an 825-foot hallway that runs through the Cambridge, Mass., university’s main buildings] looking at their feet rather than interacting with others. Wondering how to help them move beyond this led him to the idea of Charm School."
About 100 to 200 students a year participate in the daylong Charm School, which is conducted during MIT's Independent Activities Period (IAP), a four-week term in January and February.
"Charm" is defined as "the power or quality of giving delight or arousing admiration." The MIT Charm School classes aim to achieve just that, with mini-sessions ranging from "Attentive Listening 101" and "Dress With Success" to "Networking With Older Alums" and "How to Make a Charming First Impression." Successful completion of six classes earns students a B.Ch. (a Bachelor's degree in Charm); eight classes will get them an M.Ch., or Master's degree in Charm; and students will be bestowed with an impressive Ch.D., or Doctorate of Charm, after completing 10 Charm School classes. Grad students, imagine earning your Ph.D. in one day!
In a recent CBS News Sunday Morning show segment about the Charm School (see the video below), correspondent Bill Geist said: "You can be an absolute genius and still not know which fork to use." He said the MIT Charm School brings "social graces to a student body that's often stereotyped, however unfairly, as a bunch of science nerds."
Charm School "Professor-for-a-Day" Eve Sullivan teaches the practical "How to Tell Someone Something They’d Rather Not Hear" class. Sullivan, whose non-Charm School job for more than 25 years has been Senior Editorial Assistant for a theoretical physics journal at MIT, told the GradPost that her once-a-year mini-session is "pretty popular" with the students. She has been a Charm School presenter for 18 of the program's 19 years, beginning with her 1994 session called "Expressing Concern."
"Everyone has occasion to use the skills we teach," Sullivan told the GradPost. "We can all learn – or be reminded of – positive ways to address a difficult issue or speak with a person who may be struggling. We have given the same course to MIT parents, calling it 'Becoming the Parent Your College Kid Needs.'"
What are the most common faux pas students make when dealing with a difficult situation?
"It is all too easy to accuse a roommate or a family member with, 'The kitchen is a mess again; what’s wrong with you?' instead of 'I feel resentful about your leaving dirty dishes in the sink this morning because we all appreciate a clean kitchen,'" Sullivan said. "The latter approach appeals to the other person's better nature and opens the door to a solution."
Charm school courses fall into five categories: Professional Development (such as "Networking With Grace and Charm"), Interpersonal and Social Communication ("How to Make Small Talk"), Health and Wellness ("Taking the Time to Relax: Stress Relief and Meditation"), Leadership ("Confrontation: Reaching a Resolution"), and Financial ("Budgeting Basics").
What is the essence of charm? According to Charm School Prof Sullivan, it "may be the art of balancing interest in others with asserting one's own interests. If you take time to be genuinely concerned for others (whether the exchange is intimate, among peers, or in a formal social setting), ask questions and, most important, listen to peoples' replies, you will be, and be seen to be, charming. Do your best to be honest, respectful and caring in interacting with others."
OK, Gaucho grad students, so you’re not MIT students. But if you want to turn on the charm, you can check out some materials taught in previous MIT Charm School classes, ranging from how to budget effectively to how to ask for a letter of recommendation. You can find the materials here: http://studentlife.mit.edu/sao/charm/classes.